Well-dressed ladies and gentlemen, anxious for an evening of vaudeville-worthy entertainment in Council Chambers, scarcely had wrinkled their crinkly dresses and trousers into their seats than the cymbals clanged, the bass drum thundered and the curtain rose.

Speaking of rose�as in Steve Rose�

One of the wheezing traditions of the City Council is to present commendations � attached to varying degrees of seriousness � to the public before it sits down to conduct starchier business.

King Day Planners

The first presentation was intended for about 15 members of the committee that organized last month�s 2-day Martin Luther King birthday celebration.

Everything was fine � until committee members began filing toward the apron of Council Chambers where certificates are handed over and they all smile for photographers.

A videographer, new to Chambers and unnoticed by nearly everyone, unobtrusively set up his camera at stage left.

Mr. Rose interrupted with a sudden, blunt eruption.

Who Is This Person?

He demanded to know who the cameraman was. In rapid succession, he asked whether the gentleman in question possessed a license to do business in Culver City and whether he intended to rake in a profit at the city�s expense.

A collective gasp was emitted by the audience.

The videographer, too, was stunned, not to mention Mr. Rose�s City Council colleagues.

Mr. Rose said the city�s coffers were running low. The city, he said, needed to collect fees from every likely source.

Startled and overwhelmed, the object of unsolicited attention gave his name. Almost inaudibly, he explained he was not sallying out to turn a profit. He was donating his services.

Name, Rank, Relationship

He said he came to Culver City as a favor to his friend Eddie Jones, founder of the Los Angeles Civil Rights Assn. His job was to capture on film the city�s presentation to Mr. Jones, among the other persons on the Dr. King Planning Committee.

In no way was Mr. Rose mollified.

�So we are letting him go without a business license?� Mr. Rose hmphed.

Ms. Gross, who would later side strongly with Mr. Rose, spoke up as the unscheduled dramatic scenario threatened to overshadow � or dampen � the whole evening.

She judged that the dispute was a technical matter, beyond the ken of the City Council, a more appropriate subject for City Hall staffers.

Whereupon the ball, gathering moss and momentum, rolled into the lap of City Manager Jerry Fulwood.

Espying a Perceived �Violator�

Without evidence or identification in hand, he vowed that �we will contact� the videographer after the meeting.

Mr. Fulwood did not say whether he meant hours, days, months or years after the meeting. The gentleman, his business concluded, left City Hall after the Dr. King Day presentation. Missing was any sign of a City Hall staffer in dogged pursuit.

Like a covey of tranquilized doves, peace bear-hugged the environment in Council Chambers for a little more than a half-hour before the next unagendized disagreement.

The Carousel Revolves

Another tame moment caught fire.

After one more dispute between Mr. Rose and Mayor Gary Silbiger � this time over the order of the agenda � the extremely active Sister City Committee proposed an act of uncontested benignity.

Some rooms at the Vets Auditorium have unpronounceable names. In what should have been a one-sentence presentation, the Sister City group said it would donate a series of artful tile plaques, carrying the names of its sister cities, to be posted at the entry to rooms at the Vets.

In a flash, the matter became bogged down in non-negotiable complexities.

A Voice from 1990

Somebody dug up a 17-year-old memo from the legendary Syd Kronenthal, the only living ex-City Hall employee older than Culver City. Using locution no one has heard from the former Human Services director, the memo said:

�The Sister City Committee has pledged to identify (the Lethbridge Garden Room in the Vets Auditorium) with appropriate signage and pay for the expense therein.�

Suspiciously eyeing the screen in Chambers that showed two artful tile plaques, Mr. Rose and Ms. Gross separately swung into action.

A License to Operate

Mr. Rose wondered aloud whether the artist behind the plaques possessed a business license �since the city is short of money.�

Later, attorney Paul Jacobs stepped to the microphone to forcefully protest Mr. Rose�s implication, which he strongly believed was misguided.

Choosing directness over artful language, Mr. Jacobs declared, in unadorned terms, �art is free speech.�

Stepping into the center of the fray, which was volleying into a feud over whether the tile plaques constituted �public art� or another brand of art, Ms. Gross posed a question.

A Labrynthine Course, of Course

A few minutes after becoming annoyed at the Sister City Committee for ignoring presentation etiquette or policy � she said the Committee was supposed to take its offer to the Cultural Affairs Commission, not the City Council � Ms. Gross was in a philosophical mood.

There is not even room in cyberspace to delineate all of the nuances and definitions surrounding Culver City�s views on public art.

The Definition of Art

Turning to Susan Obrow, the professional maven of the city�s Cultural Affairs Division, Ms. Gross wanted to know who in the heck on the City Hall staff decided that the tile plaques were not art.

Succinctly, Ms. Obrow said, �No one said they weren�t art.� The plaques, she went on to assert, �serve a functional purpose,� which apparently, in a way, de-artifies them.

His and Hers

Turf wars � a chronic hot-button subject for several City Council members � came up repeatedly last night.

It seems that in its report, the Sister City Committee let an Italian cat out of its Italian � or rather Sicilian � bag. The Committee let the Council know that recruiting a new sister city somewhere in Sicily was on its mind.

Not So Fast

Whoa, Sister (City), said Ms. Gross, who often has reminded speakers of who is working for whom and who is in charge in this city.

The committee is not autonomous, she said. It can�t decide, willy-nilly, that it wants to recruit a new town to visit. The Council will make the call.

When the president of the Sister City Committee, who had been standing, patiently, at the speakers� podium, attempted to unsnarl a controversy that she thought was unnecessary to debate, Ms. Gross told her that her time to speak was up. This was Council-talk-time, Ms. Gross said. The scolded person was left to infer that the audience was just an observer not a participant.

Usefulness of Rules

Ms. Gross several times returned to her claim that �there is a (presentation) procedure� for the Sister City Committee, and any other donor in Culver City, to follow.

Echoing the spirit of Mr. Rose, Ms. Gross insisted that rules are drawn to be adhered to, not ignored.

A Vote Against Arcanity

Vice Mayor Alan Corlin, who had been doing more listening than speaking, shook his head and spoke up.

Why, he calmly inquired, are we arguing about arcane etiquette when the subject has been hanging around for 17 years?

Mayor Gary Silbiger and Scott Malsin concurred.

The three of them outvoted Mr. Rose and Ms. Gross to accept the tile plaques, without any strings, any easels or brushes attached.