Candidates for Religious Conversion

Ari L. NoonanSports

Dead Once, Dead Twice

Ms. Main is dead, a state that has something in common with the journalistic integrity of The Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles. The Journal would be the worst ethnic newspaper in the country if the Los Angeles Sentinel were not still breathing. Between them, the two newspapers have less credibility among discerning purveyors of journalism than a homeless drunk. But here is the rub. Huge numbers of readers are undiscerning, which explains why both weeklies still are publishing and influencing gullible masses in their communities. The Journal leaped off the Jewish values cliff when its first editor, Gene Lichtenstein, decided his Jewish newspaper would accent the Jews of Hollywood rather than addressing the raison d’être of other Jewish newspapers, the religion and the community. Like a little boy, Mr. Lichtenstein was in awe of Hollywood stars. Golly, who would believe I am living in the same town as a Hollywood star? He loved non- and anti-religious Jews. He once boasted to me that he attended Midnight Mass because the music was so beautiful. An Easterner most of his life, he never regained his composure. When he would report to the office in ultra casual clothing, I presumed he was attempting to emulate stars. Only the sunglasses were missing. During my years of stewardship under him, Mr. Lichtenstein held the same blank attitude toward Judaism that the Jewishly useless Jews of Hollywood did then and do today. The mission then and now was to make sure no serious Jew ever came away Jewishly nourished. The Journal has succeeded.

Spielberg — Undefeated in the Journal

Under the byline of a nice man, Tom Tugend, the Journal told another bad Jewish joke to its readers in this weekend’s edition, about Hollywood’s (phony)devotion to Israel, its 192nd most favorite country. I guarantee many or most readers swallowed whole Mr. Tugend’s golly-gee ludicrous fairy tale for two reasons. Many are undiscerning. The rest want desperately to believe that famous people who share their minimalist approach to Judaism — one day a year is plenty — are seen as good Jews by people who can’t tell the difference. Shunning a mountain of contrary evidence, Mr. Tugend believes the fairy tale.

The First Jewish Saint

Another emotional mission of the Jewish Journal and Mr. Tugend is to make a saint — even though Jews don’t believe in such a concept — of the wretched Jewish role model Steven Spielberg. The latest: Mr. Spielberg, a stranger to modesty, let it be known he made a donation to Israel to help it recover from the war. Mr. Spielberg made an odiously anti-Israel film last year. Since the tone-deaf staffers at the Jewish Journal share his negative belief system, they cough and keep marching. Not surprisingly, Mr. Tugend is selective in his unabashed, worshipful promotion of the Jewishly useless Jews of Hollywood. In this weekend’s cover story, he boasts about a whole stable of Gentile stars who affixed their names, at no charge, to a full-page ad in the Los Angeles Times criticizing the Hezbollah bombings of Israel. By the darnedest oversight, Mr. Tugend pretended not to notice the fact that the names of the loudest anti-religious Jewish mouths in Hollywood — Mr. Spielberg, Barbara Streisand, Rob Reiner, Larry David, Norman Lear, Debra Messing, Harvey Weinstein, David Geffen, Jeffrey Katzenberg and Richard Dreyfuss — were missing from the advertisement. If any other religion is shopping for converts, I have 10 names to suggest.